Miss March (Fox Searchlight)
Frontrunner For Worst of 2009
Ladies and gentlemen we have a contender. Yes Miss March is well on its way to being named the worst movie of 2009 and it is only March. This gross, stupid and terminally boring film has it all bad acting, profanity laden dialogue and a plodding script. Who could ask for more or less
The two lead actors, Zach Creggor and Trevor Moore, are also the co-directors and co-writers of the film so they get to share all the blame. Creggor plays Eugene and Moore is his best friend Tucker. When the film starts Eugene is dating Cindi (Raquel Alessi) and they have taken a chastity vow. However prom night promises to change that status.
On the way to the bedroom Eugene falls down a flight of stairs and ends up in a four year coma. When he wakes Tucker tells him Cindi is now a centerfold for Playboy Magazine. She is Miss March. The rest of the film concerns Eugene and Tuckers efforts to get to LA and see Cindi.
Tucker is also on the run from a group of firemen because he has assaulted a firemans sister, a girl named Candace (Molly Stanton). He stabbed her with a fork. Somehow these firemen chase him all the way to LA.
The humor in this movie is gross and not funny; the acting is wooden and not funny; and the script is just one tirade of profanity linked to another and not funny. Hugh M Hefner shows up at the end of the movie in a cameo as himself and I was embarrassed for him. Something has to be really terrible for anyone to feel pity for Hefners being in a bad movie.
The movie is rated R for profanity, violence, nudity and gross humor.
Creggor and Moore had to have had some credibility and popularity in order to get this film financed and made. How they got it remains a mystery as their looks, wit and acting ability are sub par. It is hard to imagine this movie finding any audience that would be willing to endure it.
Hopefully this film will fade quickly from sight and Creggor and Moore can go back to obscurity and lead happy and productive lives out of the entertainment field. I wish them well.
I scored Miss March a stapled 1 out of 10.
