“The Dukes Of Hazzard” (Warner Brothers)
Watching “The Dukes of Hazzard” may not be hazardous to your health but it does waste two hours of your life that you will never regain. Plus the powers that be have decided watching a car speed out of control and careen around corners is more enjoyable than watching Daisy Duke (Jessica Simpson) fill out her “daisy dukes.” I don’t think so!
The TV series was not a masterpiece of good taste and entertainment. It was corny and a little cheesy. It also did a pretty good job of making Southerners look stupid. But next to Johnny Knoxville and Seann William Scott’s performances as Luke and Bo Duke, Tom Wopat and John Schneider were Einsteins.
The plot (ha! Ha! I said “plot”) of this movie involves Boss Hogg (Burt Reynolds) plotting to take over the Duke farm from Uncle Jessie (Willie Nelson). He plans to strip mine the area. But Bo and Luke Duke won’t stand for it and they hatch a plan. It seems this was one of the weaker storylines from an old “Dukes of Hazzard,” or maybe “Petticoat Junction” or “The Beverly Hillbillies.”
The plan they hatch involves a lot of reckless driving and a lot of chases by the police. There are so many of these that the “General Lee” is the real star of the movie. And the chassis on that car can’t hold a candle to the chassis on Simpson who is relegated to only a few scenes.
Nelson sleepwalks his way through the role of Uncle Jessie waking up only long enough to crack a few dirty jokes. Reynolds plays Boss Hogg as pure evil rather than stupid which makes the movie more serious than it should be. Joe Don Baker shows up to make fun of southern politicians as the Governor of Georgia. Sonny Perdue should sue.
It isn’t that the movie is just bad – it is boringly bad. Knoxville and Scott are irritating; Reynolds is bland; and Willie is lifeless. Jessica Simpson is the bright spot but doesn’t get a chance to show any personality. Her role in this movie won’t hurt her career but it won’t be a major accomplishment either.
The film is rated PG-13 for profanity, violence and sexual innuendoes.
Let’s hope Hollywood has gotten its “let’s make a movie from an old TV series” out of its system. If not I can just see the movie versions of “All In the Family,” “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” and ‘Golden Girls” waiting in the wings. I shudder at the thought.
“I scored “The Dukes of Hazzard” a hazardous 4 out of 10.
