“Teacher’s Pet” (Walt Disney Pictures)
Once again we hear the sound of Walt Disney spinning in his grave, vault or whatever. It is hard to imagine that in his day he would greenlight a movie as dull and drawn out as “Teacher’s Pet.” Worse yet it starts off with a reference to the classic “Pinocchio.” There is no comparison. This is a bad movie with bad animation and a bad storyline.
The story concerns a dog named Spot who disguises himself as a boy named Scott. Spot wants to be a real boy in the worst way, so when he learns of a whacko professor in Florida who claims he can turn animals into humans he is off and running.
It just happens that Spot’s master, Leonard, is in Florida with his mother attending a teacher’s convention. Spot and Leonard hook up and visit the laboratory of the scientist known as Dr. Krank. They talk the scientist into using his machine on Spot and lo and behind he becomes a human. That’s when the real problems start.
A lot of top Hollywood talents lend their voices to telling this story. This vocal cast includes Nathan Lane, Kelsey Grammer, Megan Mullally, Jay Thomas and others. Lane is the standout as Spot but even he can’t overcome the trite dialogue and weak animation.
There are a few songs sprinkled through the story but only one makes an impression. It is a lively tune in which the names of all fifty states are incorporated in a travel adventure. Grammar school teachers will want to get their hands on it.
The movie is rated PG for mild crude humor.
“Teacher’s Pet” is thankfully a very short film so it shouldn’t try the attention span of the five-year-olds to whom it is aimed. Anyone over that age will think it is too long by about thirty minutes.
Walt Disney had a standard to which he aspired. Obviously those who have succeeded him don’t.
I scored “Teacher’s Pet” a dog-gone 3 out of 10.
